Day to Day Changes of Frank

Yes I am back in my blog after half a year. My son suffered a serious accident during our holidays in Spain and was in hospital for weeks. After 4 months he is completely recovered now. A miracle because he fell from a tree, 5 meters high and broke his back. The angel from our beautiful camping in Portugal had followed us on the way back to protect him.

Last 2 months I was working day and night on our campaign for sustainable chocolate. For the Dutch readers: www.groenesint.nl We have received much publicity since the launch.  The first broadcasting on TV in a popular show about consumer rights  reached an audience of 2 million (out of total Dutch population of 16 million). Since that moment we received lots of attention on TV,  in newspapers  and especially online ( after almost 3 weeks of campaigning we have already 100,000 activist participating online.

Autumn in Chile, what a difference, arriving from Holland in full spring and entering Santiago in the mist. Three day meeting with the Latin American network of corporate social responsability. 7 years ago we formed this network in Mexico. It has grown to a more visible network of more than 40 organizations from 8 countries in Latin America.. I have  not been involved very much the last 2 years and I was pleasantly surprised about the maturity of the network. The critical external evaluation was discussed and the recommendations wil be used for the new plan. I see many synergies with our Oxfam Novib plans.

It was very hectic at home before I left on this trip. Wendy went with Tim to Spain for a school trip. They had a great time. I was quietly at home with Yana enjoying very nice spring weather. We had many holidays, but I needed to prepare this trip and provide input to all kind or prepartions in Oxfam Novib for our new planning.

Then we had the horrible event on 30 april, the celebrations of the birthday of our queen (in reality of her mother). A suicidal fool killing 6 people trying to hit the bus with the royal family. Will we ever celebrate this day as innocents?

the context is very instable at the moment with the swine flu, economic crisis. what will it bring? well I need to get back to my meeting...

Back from Trinidad and NY. First it was a shock to the cold again, but since yesterday spring has entered Holland. Everybody is enjoying the sunshine. terraces fill up, people undress -painfully white- and unfortunately our neighbour starts working in the garden with a lot of noice. Then I really wish for this quiet house far away in the wilderness with no nearby neighbours! keep on dreaming.

So, nature has a quick start, but apparently old stuff has to come down first. So lamps in the house break down. Yesterday even the electricity fell out. Our computer gets more invested with whatever and becomes irritabily slow. Tim has become more addicted to Runescape. So we need to be firm parents now and stop him. How to stop an adelescent...? Please advice.

My mother fell again when she came back from the hospital. The small wound on her arm got infected and she had to stay in the hospital. She hates that and becomes increasingly difficult. The alzheimer gets worse when she is a new place. Another worry for my father. I will visit them tomorrow and my brother will also come back from LA next week.

The round table on sustainable cocoa in Trinidad was impressive. We stayed -to our disconfort- in a most luxurious Hyatt hotel. Later this month Obama will stay here with the presidents of the Americas. We almost left a note...

We had organized 20 people from NGOs, unions and farmer organizations from all over the world. We had a lot of influence in the meetings. Gave one third of all presentations and managed to get our proposal for a sustainability fund in the declaration. But process is slow with all these governments, companies, producers and NGOs involved. The government of Ivory Coast was blocking. They see all steps to develop criteria as an imposure on their autonomy. But finally they had to give in a little bit and are willing to form a national round table including NGOs.

Next round table will in the Netherlands, so a big opportunity for us to influence. With 2 xollegues we stayed 1 night and morning in NY on the way back. It was my first time in the big apple!! We went to see HAIR on broadway. What an energy, and still vital after 42 years. Replace Vietnam by Afghanistan (we just had the conference here in The Hague), and the situation is not very different.

The next day we went to Ground Zero. we took an impressive tour. Victims explained their story. for them a good way to cure their trauma, for us a very real touch with the event and its concequences. The monument of American Express: 11 tears for their personell was impressive. Drops of water falling in a water basin with 11 angles. Each drop falling in a different size and speed to symbolize the characters of the victims. Beautiful. No words are needed.

Next week I will be in Trinidad. With 400 people in a grand hotel trying to change the cocoa world. We are organizing a group of NGOs, union and cocoa farmers to give their input in the meeting. We will also present the new cocoabarometer. I just had a sneak preview and it looks great. see: www.teacoffeecocoa.org or www.p-plus.nl.

The 6 biggest chocolate brands: Mars, Nestlé, Ferrero, Cadburry, Kraft and Hershey are spending 20% of their gross margin on marketing. This is 8 billion dollars each year! If they spend 1% of this money on the training of the farmers in Ivorycoast, they can improve their situation, and the quality of the cocoa of half of these farmers, responsible for 20% of the worldwide cocoa production.

yes they can do it easily!! Cadbury already made a big shift. They will change their main chocolate brand to Fairtrade and purchase 15,000 tons of cocoa from Ghana. 10 times more than the Dutch brand Verkade, who completely shifted to Fairtrade last year.

When will the other brands follow with significant steps. Mars and Nestlé participate in a joined project with Utz Certified in Ivorycoast. The Utz standard is rather demanding for the weakly organized farmers in a country trying to overcome a civil war. More resources are needed to make that change.

Well I am looking forward to next week. Half of the chocolate world will be there, though certain important actors, especially from the US will be missing. I will also enjoy the nice weather and the new environment. A nice break. Now I need to work real hard to finish al pending issues.

Yesterday we met with the Oxford group of Brahma Kumaris. We all share the wunderful experience of this place of great energy in Oxford. We talked about transformation. This year is full of it. We get a lot of negative energy now from the economic crisis. Fear and anxiety, but it will transform in something new.  Renovation.

Seth was transforming a collegue from his work. A very critical person, locked up in himself, but with daring and useful critisism on the system. Seth reached out to him without judgement. He can manage 2 hours of intensive contact a day. His collegue is blossoming and his vision is now being appreciated.

Mary just met her ex-husband after 3 years of limited contact. She found out that she changed a lot, but her ex was still expected her old answers. He was not into transformation, and they grew apart.

Sue has a husband who is not spiritual involved, but he respects her growth and supports her. Many types of relationships are possible. People inclined to spiritual transformation are not "better persons". It is just something we need like food and excercise.

Peter is receiving coaching to plan a carreer switch. He is now considering to become a coach himself.  I am also attracted to that idea. But soon one half of the employees receive coaching from the other half. Can I leave my own judgement out, when I support someone?

I have a coach since 3 months. We have now had 5 sessions. It helped me to understand myself better. How to take up more leadership and to value my talents. It feels like a beginning transformation. I was looking also around for other jobs, but I realized myself during the coaching that I need to change myself first and I can do that perfectly well in my current job.

Our guide Lucy spoke about her own changes. How she became more calm and less emotional when she contacted her own soul and found peace. But even after many years of meditation the process of transformation never stops. When you have completed a change, something else will come up which requires attention. When you start a new transformation people can be very unpleasant for their friends and relatives. I am afraid Wendy and the kids are suffering this now and then. I am not that peaceful yet as I want to be....

Um Shanti: peace be with you!

Top 7 Reasons You Know You're Working at an Aid Organization Headquarters
- According to David Letterman (The Late Show on CBS)

1. You just had a pre-meeting to discuss your strategy planning session for the new initiative to reduce poverty by increasing access to safe water/credit/food/health care through fair and equitable distribution to
those with the right to said good or service through engagement with duty bearers in the government and other stakeholders and civil society organizations.

2. You just repeatedly slammed your head into your keyboard after spending the last 20 minutes trying to get your Skype conference call between Port au Prince, West Bank/Gaza, Delhi, Nairobi and New York to work only to fail miserably.

3. You realize that you can no longer squeeze into your cubicle past that cool hand-woven cloth from Mali, the wooden mask from Congo, the elephant figurine from Thailand and the rug from Afghanistan.

4. You just completed an annual report to your donor explaining that you're very sorry that you only managed to accomplish 2 of your 14 objectives due to sudden onset of war, drought or an invasion of futuristic nano-robots.

5. You just finished explaining to the donor that you are likely to need a two-year extension and an extra $200,000 to hire an independent consulting company to come up with a plan to fight off the nano-robots, carry out said
plan and then finish up the original activities.

6. You realize that you just used cheers, karibu, Insh'Allah or namaste in casual conversation despite the fact that you are neither English, Kenyan, Arab or Indian.

7. You tell yourself it's not failure if you turn it into a lessons-learned document. 

Well, I recognize this. Though skype meetings are still complicated at the office and I usually have them at home in the evening with Latin America. My children always wunder why I am talking angry in Spanish. When I speak formally or in complicated meetings, apparently it sounds angry to them.

Tomorrow I will take the train to Bonn for a 4C strategy meeting. I hope it will be break-through and not a lessons learned excercise.
 

Last week we organized with Oxfam Novib a workshop for 20 people from 14 different countries working in value chains. How can we make sure that more of the value of coffee, tea, soy and clothing we buy here, will stay in the hands of the farmers or workers who produce it.

Usually we fund others to organize meetings and now we had to do it ourselves. Logistics, methodology, content, reporting, we were quite busy. It reminded me of my work in Nicaragua or Cambodia which was more hands-on. We were too ambitious and the agenda was very full. Fortunately one member of the steering committee, a dynamic woman from Colombia, convinced us to start with a personal presentation of all the participation. This helped us to break the ice.

Draw your face. Explain your name. What do we appreciate in others and what do we detest? The Africans had great stories about their names and the latinos could lively describe their likes and dislikes. 

At the end of the workshop we could prepare a very good joined statement of recommendations for other civil society organizations, companies and governement to make value chains more sustainable. 8 short videos were prepared in which the problems and challenges of several sectors were presented. Soon I will give a link to the website.

I have to run to school now. The kids are starting their holidays. Now snow for us. We will stay here and make a day trip. I am looking forward for a longer break.

2009 will be the year of transformation according to the Brahma Kumaris: www.bkwsu.org

Personal transformation comes first. Some keys I am learning:

- Whatever has happened is good, what is happening now is good and what will happen is even better.  PATIENCE

- Keep your minds focused towards what is true and you will see how easy it is to remain calm. PEACE

- Do not ever become afraid to speak the truth. Be fearless and speak the truth with humility and love without anything supprressed or repressed in your heart. HONESTY

- Avoid making small thing big, but consider big situations small and chase them away. Don't let feelings of sorrow appear quickly on your face. Keep on smiling. CONTENT

- Avoid being bossy or jealous, anger will not emerge. You will remain light. Keep an accurate timetable for yourself, then your thoughts, words and actions will be accurate and others will be inspired. DIGNITY

Yesterday we had a meeting with the Oxford group. We discussed about energy. What gives us energy and what takes energy away. For me, meditation and time alone in silence is giving me energy. Creative time especially gives energy. I really want to take up painting again. Transformation was the theme for my first exhibiton in 2006. I will continue that path. I do want to activate this website. Elsa promished it for the new year. Being in groups too much time, being socially and responding to other wishes can take away my energy. Also being involved with too many topics without concentration. I need to be attentive of these energy leaks.

Today I have my time alone. Time to look back: what did I learn in 2008? What will I leave behind and not take to the next year? Time for my blog. Time for planning. Time for cleaning and the laundry. Time to try to reduce the anger between my kids. Do they need more attention? Time to care for myself.

Silence is the language God speaks. And everything else is a bad translation: Thomas Keating. 

Yes, I do long for silence, reflection, time for my inner-world. But this end of year-holidays is filled with family, friends and lots of food and company. Hardly any time to meditate or withdrawal. Difficult to find a place in my home to be silent.

All family members want to use the computer room. Tim for his favourite internet game runescape, which he would like to play 24 hours a day. Yana to chat with friends and update her recent website. She is really a member of the "Einstein Generation", because for her internet is a natural way to express herself.

Wendy now needs the room for her work. She started teaching at the Technical school (Hogeschool in Dutch) InHolland in Delft. Anatomy, animal health, etc. She has to change her presentations and is often working in the evenings and weekends to prepare her classes. So new dynamics in the house, where I have to find a new rhythm.

Yesterday we attended the farewell reception of the Palgi's, Wendy's former boss and his wife. Wendy would continue to work as a vet for one day a week. The succesor of Palgi already agreed. But twee weeks ago he suddenly changed his mind and he started formal procedures and no normal conversation was possible. Wendy was forced to quit.

Without any formal goodbye, Wendy is stopping this work after 6 years. It brought such an unnecessary tension. Why can people be more open en honest? At least Wendy could say goodbye to some of her clients, but this is not a nice ending of a working relationship.

2009 will bring a fresh start for Wendy. She likes her work at the school. It reminds her of our times in Nicaragua and Cambodia, and the collegues are friendly and discussions are open and interesting. I will work more on cocoa, next to coffee. It will be challenge to reduce my current work to be able to do additional work. We also may start a campaign on sustainable animal protein, which could take a considerable part of my time.

Good planning will be key. Learning to say NO. I have started to receive coaching. I feel some resistance, many issues which come out are not new. But I can change some patterns, or at least be aware and anticipate. OK, my silence time has come to a stop. Back to social life: LUNCH! We will go scating: It is fantastic winter weather. Then we will go to friends to celebrate new years eve. See you next year!

Power over, power with, power within.... Yesterday I attended a training about power. How to analyse power and how to address it in our work. We discussed each others work. I tried to define the power relations in the coffee chain. The industry is the most powerful. That is easy to say. Put what kind of relations do they have with the other actors, the producers, traders, retail, government, NGOs, consumers, etc. What is the visible power, the hidden or the invisible power?

The invisible power is the most intriguing. This is created by ideas and beliefs in society, which infiltrates all people. For example, that you are a poor peasant and will never receive a fair price.

In our group we were not too keen on power. The word gives negative associations. But it is a neutral word. Everybody has power. But when we use empowerment, we love it. In development work we always support the powerless. So the powerfull are the enemy. But if we don't change the role models -how to deal with power- the powerless can become as dangerous as the powerfull when they rise to power. This is clearly the case in Nicaragua. Daniel Ortega, the freedom fighter, is now fighting freedom! Our Oxfam collegues from Britain and other local organizations are suffering repression. Power to the people, be careful...

Work to do. Use the powercube and check if my work is the most effective to empower farmers and workers. Power inside: often we fight our causes, but forget ourselves. Food for thought.

How much energy does it take for your food to travel from the place of production to your plate? Especially in the UK there is a lot of commotion about the topic. Is it more ethical to buy your seasonal product from next door shop? Or will it limit trade for developing countries?

I was already impressed by a research of the Dutch Consumers Union, which demonstrated that it is better for the environment to buy normal tomatoes, grown in Dutch green houses, compared to biological tomatoes from green houses. The main reason is that in Holland only few chemicals are used in the greenhouses today, and the biological crop needs more space and uses more energy.

New dilemma's are coming up, like the food, feed or fuel discussion from last blog. We can do a lot to reduce our carbon footprint. Using energy saving lamps, dump your car and only every other year take a trip by plane. So we can still buy responsible produced mangos from Ghana....

Talking about flying, Wendy came back last week from her two weeks trip to Laos. She had a great time being with her brother and her new niece. She has to work full time this week, so I am still in charge of kids and house. At 7:30 I am already in the park with our dog, prepare lunch for the kids, get them to school, hurry to the office, phone at 4 PM how they are doing, be back at 6 PM to cook, dishes, homework, bedtime story, hug in bed, fall asleep too: I am looking for a break!

In March, I will travel to Brasil and Chile in search for responsible cocoa and wine. But it will be deadly for my carbon footprint. We still don't plant trees, but there are plans!!! Also to organize more teleconferences. That would be more efficient and we can save the planet a little bit.

Yes we can!! Great this moment of hope and possiblity of real CHANGE. Ideas2change, it is getting real close. But how to fight those crisises? financial crisis, food crisis, energy crisis, climate crisis and now the gloomy economic crisis world wide. You can not read about something else.

Will this be the moment for change. Change are way of living? Look more inward, so we do not need so many stuff to be happy for a moment. But that would also mean for me less travelling, no holidays in Italy and use some much gasoline. No trip to Costa Rica and Brazil like I am planning next week to save the world......

How am I leading my own change? This is crucial and the main reason I have not been working on my website. How can I provoke change, when I am sitting still. I am starting with a coach this week. Get external input about my carreer: mid life re-birth, or something more modest: focus.

New balance between ideals (the mind-connecting everything- head in the-air), ideas (intuition, creativity-sparkling- "finger-spitze gefühl"- hand through the- fire), spirituality (feelings within: heart-flow-until your waiste in the- water) and stability (ground zero, basis- feet on the-earth).

You may say I am dreamer, but I am not the only one.

I am on my way to Oxford. To discuss Fair Trade with other Oxfam collegues. How can we support the further growth of Fair Trade? How can we maintain the strong development approach for small holders but also expand into more supermarkets and get other multinationals aboard. Tomorrow de big Dutch chocolate company Verkade will announce that all their chocolate will be Fairtrade. This is 20% of world wide Fairtrade chocolate!!

One week ago I was in Oxford with a very different objective. Attending a 3-day seminar on meditation in a beautiful resort. This was really a re-TREAT. Spending 3 days with your inner self is a luxoury. Now I have to keep this internal light active and take this journey inside every day. Sometimes just a minute of a deep breath and reflection.

A long time has passed since I wrote in my blog. Life was too busy and I did not see much added value for my blog. I have not been able to rearrange the website, so it has not become the attractive ideas to change exchange which I envision. My dream is the same. I want to become a brooker of ideas, bring people together, connect, inspire. But I am too much involved in my daily life to go any deeper.

Holidays are approaching. Italy here we come. Florence: heat, turists and David. Good food, wine, early hikes and long siestas. We wil camp 2 weeks and have hired a house for the middle week. Some comfort. Work is complex for both of us; changes coming up, at Oxfam on a weekly basis. We are now completely in the hype of the food crisis. It is a big problem, but the causes go a long time back. We need to explain our work on export value chains related to povery and income/food security. It keeps us sharp. Wendy is also facing options in her work. Lots of stuff to talk about and not enough time in those 24 hours a day. Cutting down on sleep does not help.

We will recharge batteries and I hope to write more often in september.

Do what you have intended to do. Let go of the daily seductions to escape into "nothingness". My new credo for 2007. It feels good, to make a realistic plan for a day, and realy fulfull it first. I am trying it out in my work. Don't postpone the complicated taks, but make that phone call or write the report when the memory is still fresh.

Modern life is full of traps to wander away from your plans. Zap away on television, zap on your computer (another click to a website), zap through all the magazines you receive. What works well for me is to start the day at the office with the most important tasks. Ignore the e-mails. Better not to open Outlook. Than, at 10:30 I take a break to check my emails for half an hour and attend the urgent but not important issues.

Also at home, I can do a lot of administrative or household taks between 7-8 PM. I don't need to watch the news at 8:00. I have more than an hour to spend with the kids. Then 1 hour for meditation, yoga or my website. End the day with Wendy. Our lifes can be so busy that we forget to take time for each other.

I realize this more intensely now, when Wendy is away. She is visiting her brother Simon, his wife Oie and their daughter Yasmine. Now I have a lot of time alone, but I miss the possibility to have a glass of wine at the end of the evening and just be together.